Mirror, Mirror on the Wall, Where is God when I fall?

Mirror Mirror on the wall

Where is God when I fall?

The Child Within,

Where has she been?

Living with memories of darkness and sin.

Cannot embrace that child within.

The shame it has no end.

Don’t show your face,

Stay inside and pray.

The corner is yours dark and gray.

Silence your heart

Don’t you cry!

What good would it do?

Don’t even try.

Can’t let her out.

People will see,

The scared little girl inside of me.

She wants to be loved.

She needs to feel safe.

Embrace her today along with her sorrow,

She wants to come out And play tomorrow.

AND JUST SO HE KNOWS FOR A WHILE I WASN'T ALIVE

I seek release.

Release from this bitter cold
that courses through my body,
and conquers the will of my heart .
Maybe if I take this razor to my wrists

I can cut the pain away.

I can watch the blood drip onto the floor

just so I can see myself slip away.
I can't hold the tears back

but I can cut the pain away.

Nothing is more refreshing

than one's life upon the floor.
Hold me in this bed a little longer

I can feel your fingers dig into me still.
Maybe if I take this razor to my wrists

I can cut myself away.

As I walk through the valley of the shadow of death I take a look at my life and realize there's nothing left.
Memory, memory please go away,

The little girl in me wants to play.

From here to there

And there to where?

No one really seems to care.

Circling, whirling up and down

There is the sky
But where's the ground?

Never a child

I was destined to be

only a body filled with fear you see.

Always wondering what would come next

Always watching for him to come and get me.
The gray pavement flies beneath me

I close my eyes for a second and

I see you, your face

Burned into my memory

Like a bad dream

That I can’t wake up from.

I close my mouth but there is still a taste that I can’t stand.

                                       I smile through a thousand tears

so that no one knows my aches and fears.

Consumed by great shyness

that swallows me whole

No one sees the fire burning in my soul.
I always look behind me

for I feel someone is there.

I feel his eyes all over me

but I can’t see him anywhere.

I never speak up.
I say nothing at all.

Afraid someone will notice
if I should happen to fall.

Trying to hide disappear from the crowd

feeling left out like I’m not allowed.

I can smell his anger

locked so deep inside his soul

He had to feel the power

and so, my life, he stole.

I lock everything up

where it never comes out

so no one can feel my worry and doubt.

I’m longing for the day

when I'll finally be free

so that people can see

Normal is all I want to be.

I bleed alone.