Thursday, November 06, 2008

I stopped fighting my inner demons we’re on the same side now.

I don’t care what they say,
so what if I’m a little bit crazy.
All alone in the rain.
I’m going under.

Sometimes I feel so frozen.
Trying not to hear what they are saying,
But they are talking so loud.

Everyone around me thinks I’m going crazy.
It’s draining all of me.
But I just don’t care what they say.

I can take a lot of pain.
All I have to do is laugh a little too loud.

I never meant to cause any problems.
I only want to be seen laughing in the rain.
I’ve had enough.
I’m letting myself go.

Even if the voices aren’t real, they have some good ideas.

I so fucking hate authority figures who are contentious, because in three seconds flat, I will return the favor. Talk to me normal and I’m fine, but jump stupid and I’ll show you stupid.

That’s what I had to deal with today. FUCKING Morons!!

Last week I was stopped by a really nice officer from Glenpool, for not signaling soon enough. OKAY. He was very polite as he waited on the call back to make sure my warrant, that he helped arrest me for, was all taken care of. OKAY. I told him that it was totally cleared up, but I couldn’t help but flash on the fact that the night before I had looked up my case online and saw it said, “T.C.M.W.P. NOTICE NON-COMPLETION - PART OF SENTENCE - FAILED TO REPORT”.

Of course I knew this information was incorrect, so the next morning, I called my attorney, and spoke with a lady who answered his phone. She told me that she would have my attorney call me back. (Which he never did.)

As I’m sitting there looking in the mirror at Officer G, I’m thinking I’m about to go to jail, so I start telling my 18 year old son, who is sitting next to me, what to do with the money in my purse just in case.

A few minutes later Officer G comes back up to my window, and hands me back my license, as he again apologizes. He informs me that my warrant is all clear. To nice. I smile, and he asks one last question. You know....the ‘do you have any weapons, knives, or drugs in the car?’ kind of question. I quickly respond with a no...thinking in my mind there better not be, because it’s my sons car. But he does have a couple friends who smoke marijuana, so I get a little adrenaline rush for just a moment. Then I tell him no again, because ‘I don’t smoke any more.’ Apparently, that’s not what he’s heard.

He apologizes once again, and tells me to have a nice day, without a ticket or a search of the car. (You would have wasted your time, there was nothing in the car...relief for me to.)

Now this is the difference that I’m talking about, Officer G was professional without being a dickhead. Even if it was a fucked up reason to stop me. (I needed a little boost of adrenaline, so I can’t complain.) Smile and I’ll smile back, but be a fucking AssClown and I will unleash my feral impulses. I’ll call you every name I can think of, and try to degrade you in any way possible. (Ask Officer C Smith about that one.)

The next day after the stop, I called someone at the court clerks office and talked to them about what was posted on the site: , which says that I hadn’t completed everything required of the court. I just wanted to make sure that a few months from now this all didn’t come back on me, and I get arrested for what is posted, even if it’s not correct. I’ve been through this court shit before and all it takes is one fucking moron to deliberately not put the correct information into the system, which is what I believe has happened this time.

After talking and almost arguing with a woman at the court clerks office, she finally told me I had to speak with someone in the Work Program and they would have to remove it from the system. Okay. So, I call and leave a message. No one calls back.

Today I decided to try and get this resolved once again. I was trying to speak once again with someone at the court clerks office in Tulsa, about what was posted on the site, and how to get it removed. I was told someone from the work program would have to send up some paper work to let them know that it was all clear, since they were the ones who sent the paper work stating I hadn’t done the work hours. I tried to explain this to some asshole named Curtis, but all he wanted to do was be an AssClown. Saying things like, ‘yeah sure, I’ll get right on that...’ In the most derogatory tone, that I instantly knew he had no plans of doing anything.

I became so frustrated that I hung up on him, calling him the asshole that he is, which led to him calling me back. He said he was going to do it, but after my attitude, he wouldn’t....and at that point I broke in and screamed at him, ‘no you weren’t. I could tell by the way you were talking you aren‘t going to do anything asshole. He continued to talk, I hung up, but not before screaming ASSHOLE... Into the phone. I’ve probably got a warrant now, just because this asshole thinks he better than me, and get’s off on degrading individuals. Fuck off you stupid ass bitch before I jump stupid and show you how much of a psycho I can really be.

All I've got to say is if I get arrested for this fuck-up, I will sue the shit out of this stupid bastard.