Time For a Mind Fuck

****Warning Adult Material****

I’m obsessed with my pussy after I shave it smooth. I love the way it feels, the way it smells, hell even the way it taste is wonderful to my senses. Problem is I want to play with it all the time. I think about touching it while I’m walking through the store and I see some guy that looks like he would be fun to fuck. When I’m driving down the road and I hear a sexy song on the radio, I want to touch myself. Again I guess there’s nothing abnormal about that, unless you’re sneaking off into a public bathroom just so you can touch yourself.

I’ve never understood why it was expectable, healthy thing for a man to masturbate, but it was forbidden talk for a woman to even discuss such a topic when I was younger. There were so many things I had to learn on my own.

Then there’s porn. Most believe it’s not natural for a woman to want to watch porn. Personally, I don’t see anything wrong with watching porn, as long as everyone participating is over 18 and agreeing to what is taking place, porn can be very arousing. Sometimes a little too arousing.
I’ve been avoiding my other sites that just post information that has already been posted somewhere else on the web, and instead I’ve been trying to focus on writing more... Mostly some new sex stories. In order to get some fresh new ideas, I sometimes surf around to a few porn sites and watch various videos. I’ve been doing most of the ‘research’ in the evening when my older son is gone to work, and I’m alone for the night. I have one or two sites that I visit when I’m in the mood, but I will occasionally surf around and find a new site to visit.

Today I found a new site, and decided to spend a little time viewing the ‘mostly normal’ porn. Before I realized it, it was almost time to pick up my son from work. I quickly jumped into my car and drove towards his job. I’m just about to pull up, when I look at the time and realize that the clock on my computer was off again, and I still had almost 15 minutes before it was time to pick him up. Not wanting to sit around, I decided to go to the park near his job at Wal-Mart.

I drove to the back of the park, and found a place under some to trees to hide in the darkness. I felt safe enough there, but still I rolled up all the windows and locked the doors. I then put in a Prince CD and began listening to the song Cream. I immediately began thinking back to the videos that I had just watched. Flashes of hard dick being rapidly slammed into a woman’s pussy, flashed through my mind. The more I thought about it, the more I began to feel that all to familiar tingle beginning to stir deep in my lower stomach. I had never masturbated at the park, but the thought began seeping into the dark corners of my mind. It was shift change for law enforcement, so I figured I would be safe for a few minutes alone, and if anyone did come, I would be able to see their car lights before they had a chance to get close to me.

I left my car running, but turned out all the lights, and then I lowered the back of my seat to where it almost laid flat. I then spread my legs and put my right foot on the dashboard. This gave me plenty of room to reach down the front of my pants and cupped my freshly shaven cunt. I was still moist from watching the porn videos, so it was easy to lubricate my clit. I began twitching it back and forth between my fingers, making its little head swell. I slowly increased the pressure and stroked my clit up and down, pulling out my sweet juice from my hole.

I stopped a couple times when I had to look up to see if there were any cars coming. I didn’t want to have to explain to anyone what I was doing. I wanted it to be my little private dirty secret.

I continued listening to Prince as the song Darling Nicki began to play. I closed my eyes and went with the rhythm as I slowly worked my fingers up and down the sides of my clit. I was getting so close, but kept pausing to look up and see if any cars were coming, or if some stranger was staring in the window at me.

I looked down at the time and noticed I only had a couple minutes until it was time to pick up my son, and I hadn’t gotten off yet. At first I thought about stopping, but then I had this feeling that I was being watched, and something about that, made me speed up my stoking. Within in 30 seconds, I felt the swelling of my clit increase, and I began pumping out short little burst of cum. It continued pulsing from inside my hole, as I brushed my clit back and forth lightly.

Finally, I took a deep breathe and removed my hand from my soaked cunt. I couldn’t believe how much I had gotten off. I put my fingers one by one in my mouth and licked the cum from my fingertips. The racing of my heart slowed as I sat the seat back to its upright position. I quickly put my car in gear and left the park knowing I had yet another dirty little secret.

My game has continued for a over a week now, and each time I enjoy the thrill of what I’m doing a little more. I seem to be addicted to the possibility of some stranger lurking in the woods waiting to sneak up on me and catch me in the middle of my sex act. Now, I’m beginning to rethink this ‘thought’ after a close call a couple nights ago. I had just finished getting off and had begun to leave the park. Just as I was about to drive out, a police officer began pulling into the park. I almost froze.

He drove past me as I pulled over to another area so I could put my seatbelt on. I then expeditiously re-adjusted the seat and drove away, leaving him in the park wondering what I was doing. It also left me wondering what he was doing in the park at almost 11pm, especially since it was shift change. Have they figured out that criminals know when their shift changes and that is when some choose to break the law?

My thoughts turned to him coming up behind me and turning his lights on. I didn’t need another charge. I began wondering if he did stop me, would be able to smell the sex on my hand, even though once again I had licked my fingers afterwards? Would I then have to register as a sex offender if caught by law enforcement? The thought scares the hell out of me, but the thought is also what sent me right back to the park again tonight.

hehe...damn I'm a nasty motherfucker...lol
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Want to know 10 things about Women? Goto http://mspsycho.wordpress.com/

How does it hit you when you get bad news?

According to the Twelve Step programs, we are as sick as our secrets. But if we can find a safe place to share our secrets we can begin to work toward healing. For centuries, Christian churches recognized the healing power of sharing our inmost struggles through the Rite of Confession. So, what do you do, if you are not a Christian, but you still feel the need to confess?

We can hide our secrets in tear-stained night for as long as we want to, but it is only when we chose to bring them out into the light that we can begin to heal.

I feel like I will be dead within a year.
There’s no time for tears.

There is nothing more powerful than finding someone safe to tell "the secret" to. No one knows how hard it is, unless they've been there. Your heart pounds, your body is rock rigid, you grind your teeth, your mouth is dry. You think of all the excuses to keep your mouth shut. They'll get mad. They'll laugh. They'll reject you. They'll treat it like it was nothing and tell you to forget about it. Or worse: they'll be polite, nod their head like they understand, leave and not ever have anything to do with you again. But you have to tell someone, and oh God, please let it be the right one! Finding someone to tell, who's also been through it, is the most incredible healing thing, and the most rare.

I trusted someone with my writings and they read them and read things into them and used them against me.

Like so many of us, the relief of telling the secret was followed by a feeling of "I'm O.K. now that I talked, so it's over." So I told my friend to talk, and keep talking, talk to ME, I understand, and talk anytime you need to for as long as it takes. Don't bury it. You just scratched the surface. Open the wound and let it begin to heal.

I have finally opened the wound...Will it now begin to heal? Or will I just keep scratching at it, never letting the wound disappear?

You'll feel scared, embarrassed, angry and unsure when you first tell the secret to someone. But do it anyway. Those who've walked in your shoes understand the need to keep talking and that there's no shame for things you were too young, too scared, too vulnerable to understand, or to even stop.

Telling the secret is the only way to break the shame that binds your heart.

I confess...

I keep a weapon hidden on me at all times.
I saw a good friend die.
Some days I can’t stop eating.
I have a few secrets that I will never tell.
I suck at being a writer.
I stole things from a hotel room where I was staying.
I have a plan for my death.
I think about death everyday.
I have been arrested over 30 times.
I have sold drugs.
I witnessed a murder.
The first time I got drunk, it was with a police officer.
Some days I think about killing everyone I meet.
I hate myself.
I have lied to a police officer.
I have warrants for my arrest.
Today the voices in my head are fighting.
When I was younger my father took naked pictures of me.

Confessions

Being a psycho I tend to sometimes do some really crazy things, and later I wonder why. I know why I first began stealing, because I was accused by a school principal for stealing candy out of a candy machine, but I honestly didn’t steal anything. Still, I couldn’t prove that I didn’t and received a spanking so severe that the bruises never went away. I was only 10 years old when I began my crime spree of stealing from those of authority. Somehow it gave me satisfaction in knowing that I had taken something from them and made them feel the way I felt when I received an unjust spanking.

After that it was just a chain reaction…I committed crime after crime when I realized how easy it was to get away with doing the things I did. I could easily get all the things my parents didn’t get for me. Simple things such as make-up, new underwear, and my first bra. Which I stole because my Mom said I refused to wear one because I said it hurt when I had it on. What she failed to say is she had bought me one that was 3 sizes to small, so of course I wasn’t going to wear it. After that she never bought me another bra until I stole one from the store and she saw me trying it on. I figured out early on, if there was any that I truly needed I would have to get it myself.

As a teenager my stealing became out of control because of this way of thinking. Eventually I was stealing because I enjoyed the rush I received from strolling out the door without being caught.

This is getting long enough, so I’m going to stop here and post a few confessions, feel free to post your own if you’ve got enough balls. Right now I’m not going to explain what’s behind the post; I’ll try and explain some of that another time. Scream out loud now.

Confessions


I steal…no big surprise there.
I like cutting on myself. I also hate cutting on myself.
I once broke into a police officers house and stole his guns and badge.
I killed a dog before by poisoning it.
I have books from the library that I’ve never returned.
I’ve grown marijuana plants in my house.
I sometimes think about killing people.
I made an explosive device one day when I was bored.
I’m a drug addict.
While in prison I did heroin with a correctional officer.
I wrote things on a public bathroom wall threatening the police.
I stole something today.
I once saw a UFO.
I had sex with different officers when I was a teenager to get out of being arrested.
I gave people Christmas gifts that were stolen.
I put too much toilet paper in a toilet before just to clog it up.
I have broken into 3 liquor stores with different people.
I have stolen many cars.
I gave counterfeit money to a drug dealer.
Sometimes I take too many pills.
I’ve committed mail fraud.
I have set things on fire.
I got arrested on purpose before.
I sometimes steal for no reason.
I cheated at playing cards.
I ate a whole cake once and then I made myself throw-up.
I’ve stolen several guns and resold them.
I spit in someone’s drink.
Voices sometimes tell me to kidnap people so I can torture them.
I have a notebook where I write down everything I’ve every stolen.
I know someone who works with explosives.
I like to lick just the cheese off of chips.
I have watched some really weird porn.
I set a field on fire.
I huffed gasoline before.
I have had sex with a complete stranger.
I have stalked several police officers just for fun.
I am afraid.