Tuesday, June 30, 2009

Lifeless Breeze

Today has been dull. I did a little cleaning around the house, then cleaned out the pool, took a long swim, and then laid around doing nothing else.

I keep thinking of a thousand things to say when I’m in the shower, or in the pool cooling off, but then I get on the computer and my mind goes blank. I guess that’s what happens when you quit smoking weed. I stop again, only because I can’t afford any, so I might do a little drinking this weekend.

Thursday around noon, I’m going to Keystone Lake with a few friends and family. I don’t really need to get out in the sun any more, because I got a little sun brunt today, but it should still be fun anyway. Just got to wear some sun screen on my white ass...hehe. Lol.

I’ve been having crazy thoughts running all around in my little circles, trying to find a place called home. Don’t know if those kind of thoughts will ever cease. I went out driving the other night, around and around, until even I got bored. I’ve just got to find a new way to relax my mind.

That tingling on your cheek;
The itch on your scalp;
The goose bumps on your body;
The cold breeze around you;

Feel the tingle;
Scratch the itch;
Touch your skin;
Inhale the fresh air.

Sunday, June 28, 2009

Ways to Annoy People ( and get even ).

I’m thinking of every possible method of harassing, and annoying someone to the point of insanity.

Put Vaseline on their car door handles.
Write their name and phone number on a public bathroom wall.
When you are talking to them, stare back and forth at their eyebrows.
Sign up their e-mail address on spam websites.
Steal their pets and wrap them up in duct tape.
Sign them up with a music or video club, picking out the types you know they don’t like.
Send an anonymous love letter to their house, telling them you will by stopping by at midnight, but never show up.
Unscrew the light bulbs in their house just enough so they won’t work.
Place syringes around them or in their cars, and then car the cops.
If their pets really annoy you, kill them, then run them over and toss them by the side of road so they look like road kill.
When they are gone use their water to water your lawn.
Leave carrots on their doorstep at night.
Clog up their toilet.
Mumble when you speak to them.
Constantly remind them of bad times.
When doing something illegal, use their name.
Drop Alka-Seltzer into their fish tank.
Plant marijuana by the side of their house.
Go to a party, but give them the wrong directions.
Use lamp oil to kill their lawn in spots.
Tap needle size hole into a dozen eggs and sit them in the sun for a week...egg their house or put them under the seat in their car.
Place ad on Craigslist, selling their car for only $100 dollars.
Send out announcements to their family, saying they are having a wild sex party.
Turn on their oven when they aren’t looking.
Put Saran Wrap over their toilet seat.
Turn their car stereo up all the way before they go somewhere.
Follow them around smiling a lot.
Spread nasty rumors about them.
Make a fake pipe bomb and leave it on the street in front of their house.
Use a ice-pick and punch holes into their car tire.
Ask to use their phone, call 911 and put the phone down, then leave.
If you have cock roaches, catch some of them and release them at their house.
Put a condom fill with Mayo, in their mailbox.
Make several indoor sale signs with their address and place them around town, telling people just to come right in.
Put big chunks of broken glass under their car wheels.
Use their trashcan for all your garbage.
Break into their house while their gone and leave their refrigerator open.
Buy a piece of fish, leave in sun to two days, then put it in their car.
Get their credit card number and charge all you can to it in one day.
Put crayons on the dashboard of their car.
Put a small amount of soap in the end of their toothpaste.

Thursday, June 25, 2009

Let’s Cut Our Wrist and Then Burn Down Something.

I’m really fucking high right now, so if this comes off sounding crazier than usual, (or better than usual...hehe) you’ll understand why, but I had to get high. I haven’t been high for a long time now, mostly because I just can’t afford to buy any. It really hasn’t bothered me much not smoking, until the past week or so. I’ve been feeling jittery, nervous, agitated, or high-strung, as my last probation officer put it, from the moment I get up until the moment I force myself to lay down for a few hours of sleep.

I’ve had this feeling off and on over the years. When I was a teen and it would happen, I would often find myself locked up either in jail or in a nut house somewhere. That was one of the reasons I began smoking weed... To help calm me down and relax me from the agitated state that my mind often goes to for no reason. Fuck both of those places! Being locked up when I’m in this state of mind is usually never any good... I’m probably going to cut myself with the first sharp object I find or get into some altercation with those who have me incarcerated.

I’ve been trying everything short of cutting myself, or fucking with law enforcement, to bring myself out of this unsettling mood, and nothing seems to be working. So, when a friend from Tulsa called and asked me to stop by, I didn’t hesitate. I figure it’s better to be high than to commit a crime, injury myself, or do something else stupid.

I was met at the door with a 6-point beer and a hefty blunt, which I lit before I made it back to his bedroom. We sat on his bed, watching the news and discussing the latest information about Michael Jackson dieing. Half-way through the blunt, I began talking about some of my stress from the past week, and before I knew it, my stress was greatly diminished. Shit that I had been stressing over, suddenly didn’t feel like that big of deal any longer.

I FORGOT all my problems.. hehe.

A couple hours later, in possession of a limited amount of marijuana, (in case the stress returns), I cautiously made my way through Borg territory, and safely through the front door to my nicely chilled home. After relaxing for a little while, I managed to get some laundry done, and the house straightened to acceptable standards. Next, I called my little friend, and of course she told me to come right over.

The effects of the blunt still lightly lingered, so when we smoked a bowl, my high kicked right back in to a nice and relaxed state. If only this shit was legal there would probably be a lot less killing in this world. I mean, think about it... For me... If I’m high, I’m engrossed in other thoughts, I’m not angry or thinking about smashing in someone’s face.

If you don’t light up the darkness, you’ll always being living in the shadows.

Wednesday, June 24, 2009

Once Again, Hell is my Home

Blame it on the heat, or my fucked up mind, but if I would have had my gun today, right now outside there would be several cars with their lights on. I feel like I’m losing my mind. I can’t stand being around certain people, without feeling the need to hurt them. I’ve gone on so many walks trying to gain a different perspective, which has helped some, anyway no one is dead yet. But now I’m having a lot of pain in my knees again, so long walks to relieve the stress will have to put on hold for a little while. For now, I guess it’s back to sitting on my ass, writing again and gaining back all the weight I’ve lost. FUCK!

I guess I will forever be the bad guy (girl).

Once again, hell is my home.

I am a poet of the body and soul;
Just trying to make my mind whole.

I got lost on the journey to find myself;
Like a forgotten book on a shelf.

The pleasures of heaven I write for temptation;
And the pains of hell are my private communication.

Vulgar and rude are prevalent to my writing;
This is why MsPsycho is so enticing.

A tempting snack specifically designed,
To help the mind leisurely unwind.

Push it hard, and run it deep;
Are wonderful words that help us sleep.

But don’t get to close to me,
Because all you’ll ever feel is misery.

There’s always a creature lurking in the distance,
Trying to end my miserable existence.

Let me feel the heat of your breath on my skin;
So I can feel alive once again.

Swirl your tongue around through my mouth,
Rinse it around and spit it out.

Cease my breathing and close my eyes,
So that I might once again unfurl my wings and learn to fly.

Just don’t let me get me;
For sometimes I just can’t see.

Life is a rollercoaster ride.... So ride that son-of-bitch until you puke!!
Go ahead... Piss me off... Blood looks stunning on white carpet!
Let’s cut our wrist and then burn down something.
Dreams come true, but so do nightmares.

Wednesday, June 17, 2009

Stalking Fun on My Other Blog... hehe

For those who follow my other blog ... http://mspsycho.wordpress.com/ I have posted a new story titled Stalking Can Be Fun. Hope everyone enjoys!!!
XXX ... Warning Adult Stories... XXX

This story, like most all others on my site, is purely a work of fiction from a writers mind that is sometimes not always stable, but she stills enjoys a good naughty story. No harm to any actual person will every occur.
She wasn’t following you, but I was. I was watching you as you drove down the highway, turning left and then back right. I see where you’re going. Into the store for a quick drink, and maybe a little chatting with the cute girl standing in line. Then a stop at the smoke shop for a pack of cigarettes to smoke during the times when you are bored out of your mind and waiting on some criminal to break the law. After all, you’ve got to use those shinny new cuffs for something.

Are you watching me? I’m watching you. Are you afraid of me? You might want to be.

Some people will tell that preparation is the key, and they are not totally wrong, still I prefer the spur of the moment decision in picking out a random officer to stalk. Then I’ll watch him for days, learning the times when he is at home, where he goes when he leaves, writing down all the important notes in my spiral bound notebook to study later. Personally, I don’t won’t a defenseless victim… That’s why I target law enforcement… I want someone who will try to fight back.

The most important factor in successful stalking is not getting so close that your target figures out you’re following them. If they figure out you’re following them, they will bolt like a scared little rabbit, ruining in future plans of torture to your victim.

Next follow them home. Once you’ve found out where he lives, you can easily monitor when he is at home and when he is working. Making it easy to find the right time to creep into his house and maybe remove a few personal items to keep as trophies, or just to touch and smell later. Since they are in law enforcement, doing something to draw them away from their house is a easy thing to accomplish.

Just make sure you study the layout of his house while there, that way when you return it won’t be a problem navigating your way around in the dark.

It’s also a lot of fun looking through his windows later… you watch him as he stands beside his bed and removes the keys hanging from the front of his belt, along with the extra set of cuffs hanging in the back. He slowly removes the belt from around his waist that holds his weapon on the right side of his body. He then removes his badge from over his heart and sets it gently on the table near his bed along with the pen he has used that day to write law breakers citations. He removes his radio and then unbuttons the front of his shirt, exposing the bullet proof vest underneath. Carefully he removes the straps and tosses the vest onto a chair sitting in the corner. He stands there in only a black tee-shirt and his pants with the many pockets, each filled with various items needed to fulfill his duty requirements.

I observe my target and establish his routine. I may even find him online so I can learn his habits, what he likes and doesn’t like. I want to know what he knows. Eat where he eats. I want to watch him each day and night as he finishes removing the last few articles of clothing from his body, exposing his fully nude body. Is it then that he feels the most vulnerable? Should I attack him then?

It was all too easy, I thought with a wide smile across my face. He had just gotten off duty and would probably be standing next to his bed getting ready to make love to his wife. As his wife watches him removing his uniform, I was busy cutting the main phone line into the house and then unlocking the side door leading into his garage. Walking silently into the dark garage, I find the door leading into the kitchen. There was no need for a light of any sort because I had been in his house many times before and easily knew where everything was located.

Suddenly there was a flash of a light being turned on, and the sound of a man’s voice broke through the quiet night air.

“Who’s there?” his deep voice shouted from the other side of the room.

I froze for a second, and then looked up to see it was my prey standing there in nothing but his boxers. For a man in his forties, he still looked really good and was in great psychical shape.
For the rest of the story visit: http://mspsycho.wordpress.com/

Saturday, June 06, 2009

Don’t Annoy the Crazy Person

Today I hate everything and everybody. People sometimes get on my nerves so bad, that I barely believe that I haven’t gone on a violent killing spree, ending the life of all the worthless, inconsiderate, stupid individuals that care only about themselves and what they can get from others. I’m not going to name names, because I have to deal with these people everyday, but if I do ever snap they are going to be the first ones I open fire on.

Things have been moving along pleasantly enough that I haven’t felt stressed or lost out of my mind since the car accident, until today. Not having enough money to get everyday things done, is my main concern. I often think about robbing a bank or something, but then my reason for robbing the bank would be lost when I have to go on the run. At times, that is the way I think I would like my life to end... Instead of death laying beside me on the couch or in my bed, I want him to push me off and walk with me for my last few breaths as I liberate enough funds for one last celebration. That’s just a psycho thought right?

I am once again having some medical issues that has to be addressed soon. Sometime tomorrow, I have to go the ER because my fucking, stupid insurance won’t pay for urgent care, and my retarded ass doctor’s office never called me back. I’m not going to go into that shit right now, besides this blog is not suppose to be about my daily life, but about the insane thoughts that float freely inside my head. I’m working on a new story, but I haven’t been able to focus on it much since I got a headache on Tuesday, and it still hasn’t gone away, no matter what I take for the pain.


If it makes you less sad I will die by your hands. You can tell me how vile I already know that I am.