Sunday, January 01, 2006

Unpopular speech is the foundation of the country.

Freedom to speak one's own mind.

Social rejection is more frightening than the seemingly remote possiblity of death.
Kids laughing at you.

More readily accept you into their group. Fit in where you can.
Teachers themselves can sometimes be the problem.

We create terror to help us understand our own fears.

My wish to die would sometimes only be a momentary feeling. Other times the impulse to end my life would last a few hours or sometimes a few days.

I never wanted to say anything after my father had touched me, because I didn't want to 'make trouble' for the family; enough was already going on. "Whose going to pay your brothers hospital bills if I go to jail?" Perhaps I should just run away and never be found again. Counted squares on the ceiling to keep my mind off what he was doing to me. ...I couldn't contribute to the division of my family.


My heart is beating hard in my chest, my stomach is quezzy, I'm sweating, sounds are distorted, feel dizzy...I want to throw-up.

The world is so unkind.

Do y0u find my behavior distrubing?

I like to taunt the police. Pushing the edge of defiance. When has justice been as simple as a rule book. We blindly put our trust in those of power.
You need to tighten up that bullet-proof vest.
Shooting police would be some bold shit.

Pain is the only trustworthy assurance that life goes on. After cutting myself, it felt like a wave of relief would flood over my entire body. I would feel only numbness as the blood flowed down my wrist. I didn't want to die, I just wanted to stop feeling pain. Need to feel pain to feel alive.
I cut----I feel relief..........1-800-DONTCUT

Yes I have issues.

Crazy, horrible, powerless, conformity, justifed, conflict, confused, escape, insanity, anxiety, unreal, loss of control, retribution

Some wounds can never heal.

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