Thursday, October 26, 2006
I've decided to get rid of all the depression "crazy" pills that I have acquired over the past several years from a variety of doctors. Each believing that they could 'cure' me of the awful demons that lurks in my mind by putting me on some sort of mind altering drug. I would try the Psychiatrist's choice of drug through 2 or 3 refills. By that time I would begin experiencing the side effects that accompany most psychiatric drugs. Sometimes I would feel so depressed, that I thought the world was going to crumble in around me, and the only way to end my misery was to take my life. The other side effects, were at times just as bad. Some made me not able to sleep, or over sleep, most made me gain weight, and made it nearly impossible to achieve an orgasm. So I would quit taking the drugs and feel okay from the side effects for a little while, but soon the depression would again return. I then would find myself looking for another doctor. This time I'm not going to look for another doctor.
I can't believe how many I had…they are like a reminder of who I am, and I don't want to be reminded any more. I want to let go of all the things from my past…I want to move on…without the pills.
List of my pills Lithium Carb 300mg, Carbamazepine 200mg, Zoloft 100mg, Depakote 250mg, Effoxor xr 75mg, Paxil 30mg, Celexa, Wellbutrin