Let’s see if I can remember how to do this....
Another.... Now breathe normal and relax.
I don’t know how to really start this, except to say I’m not dead, or in jail. Psychically I’m fair. Mentally... Well let’s just say that’s where my problem is staying for a extended vacation.
I’ve started so many different stories and thoughts, but I’ve been unable to finish any of them. I tell myself I can write, if I would only focus. But my words get lost before they find their way onto the pages for others to see.
When I first started this blog, I would walk around all day thinking about what I should write about. Back then, everything was blog material. I could see stories every where I looked. Now, my mind feels absolute blankness. The images are no longer there. I don’t see the story behind the man or woman as they move along with their daily life. Without meaning. It’s as if we are all nothing more than fake images on a computer screen.
It feels pointless to try and change. Why? For what reason should I continue? I’ve been a nobody all my life and I’m sure that’s who I will continue to be. Then I saw this quote the other day....
Don't let your past dictate your future, but let your past be part of what you become.
Deep breath again!... And again...
I enjoy writing. But to return, I have to take care of a few obsessive compulsive behaviors that I have been letting run my life for about the past year. I have to get it under control now that it has reached a peak. If I don’t control it now, it will forever control me. And that’s not the path I want to walk on.
I will return soon. Thanks everyone for hanging around.